When God Calls Early in the Morning

I'm not a morning person. My body naturally wakes up around 9 a.m. but because of work I get up in the mornings and consume coffee to get me going and functioning.

However, this morning God had different plans for me. I'm in the midst of a very big decision in my life, one God has asked me to answer over and over again. "Are you really all in?"

As a LeadHer Director, I have been reading Mark Batterson's "The Circle Maker" with my fellow sisters. We've been praying some big, audacious prayers and seeing big, crazy results. So it's no wonder that many of us are having the question of "Are you really all in?" pop up and tested in our lives.

So this morning was no chance or circumstance. I 100% believe that God is by my side and leading through these waters. (Believe me, it's nerve-wrecking, I've had Hillsong United's "Oceans" playing on repeat for a month!) I woke up around 3:30 a.m. and to my surprise I could not go back to sleep. The worries of my decision and my family's status started to creep in; however, I was determined that I was not going to let it entangle me today.

I grabbed my phone in the dark and began to read scripture and encouraging posts, and started to pray. Then, I felt God's prompting, "If you're serious, then get up and really pray!" So I got up on my knees at my bedside and began to pray. To my surprise, the message alerts on my phone began to go off, two people were messaging me almost simultaneously. One was telling me exciting news and praying with me, and the other was asking for prayer.

I had some serious prayer time -- like ugly cry serious prayer. So I thought I was good when I was finished praying; however, I was still awake. Knowing the big plans ahead of me, I grabbed my stuff and thought I would get a head's start on my tasks in the living room. But God had other plans.

Almost as soon as I sat down and started to work, I received a text from another dear friend saying that she had been praying for me. I was encouraged and thanked her, then we started talking more in depth. I told her about my early morning prompting to pray, and she said that she had also been up at that time praying for me! I was amazed, and then she shared scripture with me Deuteronomy 30:9-10. I, of course, was intrigued and looked it up in YouVersion. I love to read several translations of the Bible; however, this time when I opened the app The Message translation was selected. Some believers do not agree with The Message because it's a modern version that paraphrases the Bible. However, being a writer, I love the easy, yet beautifully segmented scripts.

Before I post the scripture I have to give you a little backstory. As most of you know, I am a single, never married 30-year-old woman who loves children. Naturally, I desire to have a family of my own someday, basically since I was four I knew I wanted to be a Momma. So being in the stage I'm in, there are days when the desires are almost painful to the point of mourning, and because of different family histories, I fear not being able to have bare children of my own when I am married. So not wanting to consume myself with more fear, I don't talk about it a lot. I spend time with children as much as possible, love every minute of it and just trust God. However, lately it seems God has been giving me messages to let me know even more that He does know my heart's desire, and He truly is beside me.

So I looked up the scripture in The Message and read this, and you can tell what leapt off the screen:

8-9 And you will make a new start, listening obediently to God, keeping all his commandments that I’m commanding you today. God, your God, will outdo himself in making things go well for you: you’ll have babies, get calves, grow crops, and enjoy an all-around good life. Yes, God will start enjoying you again, making things go well for you just as he enjoyed doing it for your ancestors.

10But only if you listen obediently to God, your God, and keep the commandments and regulations written in this Book of Revelation. Nothing halfhearted here; you must return to God, your God, totally, heart and soul, holding nothing back.

At this point, I was still texting my friend and sent her what I just read. I was ecstatic! Since reading "The Circle Maker," I have been circling the promises of God and that most certainly felt like a promise specifically for me in that moment. We texted for a bit more about our excitement for what God was doing and then gave our goodbyes for the day. You would think this would be enough for one exciting morning but no, God still was not done.

Another dear friend messaged me around the end of that conversation to tell me that she was also praying for me. At this point, it's around 6 a.m., when most of my friends are getting up and ready for work so hearing that again was no biggie, right? So I proceeded to tell my friend the excitement of what had happened, and she also shared my excitement. Then, after telling her that I was awake around 3:30 a.m. praying, she tells me she was also praying for me at 4 a.m. Friends, that's now 3 people praying for me at 4:00 a.m., and this is not normal! Needless to say, at this point I am crying again. What an amazing display of God's love for me that He would have three amazing people up before the crack of dawn praying with me!

Upon this realization, I knew I had to share. I know there are many of you who think you're at the end of the  rope, and God isn't hearing your prayers, or you may not even believe in God. Please, let this be a sign to you! He sees your struggles. He knows your heart's desires. He loves you more than life, and that's why God sent His son, Jesus Christ, to die for you so you could have eternal life with Him! He's good with the details. He knows the number of hairs on your head and the stars in the sky. He takes care of the birds, trees and all the seas, and He longs to care for you even more. If you're in need of prayer or have questions about a relationship with God, please message me. I would be happy to help you or find someone who can help you.

I pray the Lord blesses you all with a wonderful day! After all, it's just now about 8 a.m. CST.  He's up to something...

Love you, friends!

Many blessings,

Jenn

A Letter of Wisdom to My 18-Year-Old Self

Earlier this month I hit a pretty big milestone, I turned 30. While many fear it, I embraced it because of what I have learned in my short time here. I know not everyone is promised another year and I know many great things are to come. 

I also know I have a torch to carry for the generations to come. I think of the mighty women of God in my family: my grandmothers and my mother who all stood courageously to raise their children in a Christian home, even if they sometimes had to stand alone. I'm encouraged by the words in 2 Timothy 1:5, "I remember your genuine faith, for you share the faith that first filled your grandmother Lois and your mother, Eunice. And I know that same faith continues strong in you."

It's the torch, challenge and inspiration received from my family and LeadHer sisters that encouraged me to prayerfully pen this letter. It's a love letter to my Jesus, who I met 23 years ago today, and also to my sisters that it might bring hope, help and healing.

Dear 18-year-old Jenn,

"Sweet," "gullible," "always smiling," Jenn, these are the descriptions that you have grown up hearing, and they will follow you into your future. However, as much as love to daydream, I have to warn you that the reality of the years to come will rage a war on your innocence, and this is why it's so important for you to listen to these words of wisdom: guard your heart; you are beautiful; be unique. 

Proverbs 4:23 reads, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Since you were a little girl, you have been your Daddy's "pride and joy," and he treated you like a princess, when He had the time. You watched every fairy tale and chick flick because they fed even more into your daydreams and innocence. And, you have craved that attention from a guy every day of your life. However, this has created a false and hurtful reality. While it's wonderful to see the good in people, you must proceed with caution, and guard your heart for the one that God has truly created to love you as He does. You befriend and chase boy after boy, guy after guy looking for your "Prince Charming" and craving his attention, and time after time, you are hurt because "Prince Charming" does not exist in reality. The truth is the only love that will ever truly fill the love your heart desires is the love you already know in your Heavenly Father. He will always have time for you, and give you so much attention. He can woo and sweep you off your feet like no other. The more attention you give to following Him and reading His love letters, the more you will see His love. Then, as much as you hate to wait, I truly believe when you fall "head over heels" in love with your Heavenly Father, He will lead you to a man who will love you as Christ loves His church. Neither of you will be perfect because we do not live in a perfect world; however, if you seek God together, there's no telling the places He will take you.

Sweet girl, you must not only guard your heart for God and His true love, also guard your heart for strength. The reality is we live in a dark world, and the enemy will use situations and the people you love to hurt you. You will see tragedy, trials and temptations that want to steal your innocence. Death and circumstances will take people from your life like a revolving door, and harsh words from those closest to you will hurt. However, love them and enjoy every moment and memory that you can with them because tomorrow is not promised and there's a purpose for every person that crosses your path. You will be broken; however, know your Heavenly Father loves to catch you, your tears and the pieces of your heart. He will wrap you and them in His loving arms and restore them for His greater purpose. You truly cannot imagine the amazing love of your Heavenly Father. 

He loves you and in His eyes, you are beautiful. He made you in His image. These are the words He knows to be true and longs to hear from you, "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." The Father, Son and Holy Spirit created man and woman in their image and said, "they were very good." I know you struggle with your weight, the photos in the magazines, TV and movie screens, as well as the harsh words from mean girls and guys. However, know that God sees you as beautiful no matter what the number on the scale is because all of His creation is good. He sees your beautiful heart and does not want you to cause harm to the beautiful person He created just so you can "fit in" to the false expectations and lies of an evil world. Trust the plans He has for you that were written long before you were born and know you are beautiful each and every step of the way.

You were born to standout, my dear, so be your unique self. Laugh at your quirkiness and embrace your personal style. You have been a Jesus Freak since you accepted Him at age 7 and have not been ashamed to speak His name. Stand strong and do not back down. It will not be easy, but Christ did not promise that the Christian walk would be easy; however, He did promise that He would not leave or forsake us. You will be questioned by your family and friends but know this is a sure sign that you are doing what is right in following the will of your Heavenly Father. People have always looked at you as "weird" but embrace it because you are part of the chosen called by Him for a greater purpose. As it says in 1 Peter 2:9-10 The Message, "But you are the ones chosen by God, chosen for the high calling of priestly work, chosen to be a holy people, God’s instruments to do his work and speak out for him, to tell others of the night-and-day difference he made for you—from nothing to something, from rejected to accepted." You will feel rejected time and time again but do not give up. Remember His promises, lean on Him and know that He will always love and accept you.

So stay strong, stand firm in the purpose He gave you and keep shining your bright smile for Jesus! And one final thought, in the wise words of your youth pastor, "Keep 'em thirsty!"

Love always,
Jenn

Sharing My Story, Starting a New Chapter!

So yeah, it's been a while... I can't tell you the number of times I've started to post and then stopped. God has done a lot of work in a little more than a year. My family has gone through more tests, and although they are not over, I know He is faithful. I know there is more of the story to share and parts that I am holding onto tight He will have me share one day in His perfect timing. After all, they are a part of the journey.

However, I do want to share some exciting updates with you, if you have not already read them from my Facebook posts. I'm starting a new chapter and God has given me a couple of opportunities to share my story along the way to this new beginning.

First, I was introduced to The Grace Mask blog through friends at church. I was really excited about this opportunity because I really desired to have some professional photos taken in light of the miraculous weight loss journey God gave me. However, I knew it was about more than beauty shots. I knew this was something God wanted to use also. So for this reason and in God's direction, I chose to share the story on The Grace Mask blog. The experience was such a blessing. I was able to hear more amazing God stories and encourage others to share what God has done in their lives.  I'm so thankful for the stepping stones He brings that lead to another part of the journey, and the people He brings along the way to make those amazing impacts.

Second, the BIGGEST change in my life has occurred with my involvement in the amazing ministry and organization of LeadHer. God brought together so many puzzle pieces of my journey when He placed this ministry and all the wonderful ladies into my life. Looking back at it now, I can truly see God's hand in it all. I am so blessed to be a part of this ministry and cannot believe God is allowing me to be involved in such a marvelous work of His. I am daily encouraged by the ladies, who are older and younger than me, as they speak words of Truth and Life. I'm truly excited about this new chapter -- to see how the ministry will grow and all of the new faces He will bring into our paths along the way.

With this new chapter, I will be spending a great deal of time posting on the social media sites for LeadHer, as well as other responsibilities. Among those responsibilities will be the LeadHer blog. For my first post, I wrote an introductory piece and some insight as to my involvement in the ministry. So with that being said, I cannot tell you how often I will actually be on this blog. However, I hope you will to continue to follow all the amazing things God is doing via the Facebook and LeadHer sites. I cannot really express how amazing this whole opportunity is for me. Again, all I can think is, "God is Faithful, and I am humbled!"

There's a song by Casting Crowns called "You're Already There" that really relates to it all. Singer Mark Hall shares the story of the song here. I hope you all know that no matter what you are facing, whether it's a valley or mountain top experience that God truly is there through it all with you. Nothing is a surprise to Him. He loves you with an everlasting love and He wants the best for you!

Thank you all for your continued support, prayer and encouragement along the way. You all are a blessing.

Many Blessings,
Jenn